Christmas was great this year, for my daughter especially. i loved seeing the light up of her face whenever she saw whatever santa clause had brought her! and in those moments i re relized why im on my adventure of getting my bi-polar under control. not just for me but for her.
i apologize for not blogging the past few days, they have been busy but very much relaxing in the same sense....meaning when i wasnt busy i was busy relaxing, which is something i needed very much so, especially to gather my thoughts on my life.... and i have come to the conclusion that i am loving life right now to the max!
my very best friend is in town, and i admitt im on a high of a rush, cause with him here i feel like "ah heres my comfort....i can breath again" literally this guy is my breath of fresh air or my breath suddenly refilling my lungs with CPR when i need him. he truely is the dearest friend i have and the best one threw the years. he doesnt put up with my shit, hes known i was bi-polar a full year before i knew, and hes been threw all the shit with me and he still comes with open arms, forgives me and lets me cry and relax and i love him more than he will ever know for it..... from now on i will refere to him as Edward (you know as twilight Edward), cause he has always saved me know knows me who i am truely and loves and cares for me for who i am over looking my bi-polar and shit, just like an older brother would and should....just like Bella who thinks of Edward in the book as her fresh air and someone who she needed to live; this is who he is to me (without the romantic part i would be more like Alice with him hints the whole brother part)
well yes Edward is in town, im excited, and no im not on a mania, havent had one in a while, which with the main source of stress, we shall call him mr. annoying, been pounding my voicemail and texting, i should have been on atleast three or four at this point. which i guess is one sign that my meds are fully starting to take affect! Thank you God!
with a fresh cup of coffee in my hand, my daughter sound asleep peaceful (back home yay :) ), soon to be lit cig and my new great book i am enjoying (Nicholas Sparks The Last Song), and a great night out with Edward tonight, and the whole week with him (threw new years yay! with the addition of my very best girl friend, we shall call her miss panama, here as well) and a new dearest friend, mister muscles, each day that passes is a day closer to him coming home (yes hes still keeping me straight and kicking my butt over the phone when needed) and seeing my sister and wanting my reconnection with her, and overall the enjoyment with my parents and my family this holiday week.... my life is going GREAT!
ahh *sighs* im going to enjoy it while i can because i know it will pitfall eventually; but right now the outlook when that will happen looks able to bare, yes at the moment; might be different amongst the pitfall... but like i say there are always "upsides of down" and right now i see clearly the upsides.... thank you everyone in my life who is apart of this; i love yall more than life itself and i hope yall can see im trying my best!
ps- i finally get to go to my dr. again on monday so yay! open up and vent a little and continue on trucking! whose on board with me?
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